Nova = No loss

We have no chance of scoring more than two runs against Grover Cleveland Arrieta.

Nova’s ERA is why numbers are better than eyes.  Although perhaps his FIP/xFIP would favor eyes?

I guess May 2 is not too early for a whatever.

Wow - amazing that some bad games, this early, can drive everyone away.

Jeterian.

The radio people said Cano just saved Ibanez. Is that right?

[7] Ran halfway to the warning track to make an over-the-shoulder catch.

[8] From 2B… that’s a joke, right?

Nope. He went deep, and Ibanez was still 15’ away.

Robertson-esque.

Actually, Wetteland-esque

See, now, THAT’s how you keep your pitch count under 25 per inning.

How bad is Gardner’s injury?  Was he supposed to be out this long?
Which, if I measure by how long it feels is… forever.

I feel for Nova, tonite.

Facing righties, if he pitches them inside, the ball goes to Jones. If he stays outside, you have to guard against hits towards Igauana.

Facing lefties, if he pitches inside, it goes to Igauana, and outside goes to Jones.

There’s no safe approach to any batter.

A-Rod is the Mickey Mantle of our crappy, underproducing players.

Time for a Cano HR.

Cano is totally fucking cooked.

Ugh.

[17] Working the pitch count is the new HR

2008 Cano

2008 Cano

Good thing RBIs is a meaningless stat or I’d be upset about Cano’s year so far.

Might as well extend Cano with a 10 year $300M contract now, he is already producing like ARod.

[23] You have to use your eyes to appreciate Cano’s game this year, because the numbers will lie and tell you he’s a disappointment.

Every time a human umpire dies and robot umpire gets its wings.

Has Teix even tried to bunt this year?

Swinging at ball four.  And a crappy swing at that.

Teixeira swung at a ball in the dirt on a 3-2 count

Has Teix even tried to HIT this year ?

As soon as April ends Mark will bust loose

They might want to rethink the hit-into-the-shift drill they do with Teix during bp where they have Nunez at 2nd and Iguano in right. It makes him think putting the ball weakly into play is the correct strategy.

At least we’re not getting swept by the Astros.  Although I’m sure we would be.

28 up, 27 down: The Jake Arrieta Story.

Cuellar, Dobson, McNally and Palmer still got it.

Three scoreless to start the game? It’s a Cinco de Mayo Eve-eve-eve miracle!

Singleton with a vintage reverse jinx saying Arrieta has “good stuff”.

WOE

If I am Arrieta, I will just intentionally walk Granderson and take my chances with:
Rodriguez DH
Cano 2B
Teixeira 1B

Figured Iganez was going to catch that one due to it seeming like he was starting each pitch in the bleachers and having to climb down before attempting to make a play earlier in the game.

Ballgame.

Oh, just stop that, you silly person, you.

[41] But there is still the inevitable bases loaded with no outs but no runs score tease to look forward to.

wtf is up with cano

Ok, I’m now worried about Cano.  That was one awful atbat.

[44] KLong thinks he is lunging at the ball and needs to shorten his stride.

I just think he’s lazy.

Cano is an overrated player. He is so smooth that people think he is better than he really is

Teix showing off pitchers mound power.

[47] So, he will ONLY get a 10 year $275M extension, is that what you are trying to say?

Really, in 2014 this team deserves to have its only positional players be ARod and Teix. Let everyone Farnsing walk.

Technically, Joe, any roster with both Igauana and Jones on it is already playing “two men down”, not one. Gardner being out makes it three. Swisher makes it four. Pinata makes it five.

We are DOOMED.

Teix makes it six.

Hughes makes it seven. Garcia makes it eight. This is fun. I’ve almost fielded an entire team of non-players through injury and suckage.

Tex’s wife is too hot for him.

“Injury and suckage” is also the name of my S&M brothel.

Great, now Chavez is about to keel over.

[56]
As a friend of ours would say: Boom!

What was that?  Chavez choke on something?

One of the stadium lights shined too brightly and Chavez must have pulled something.

edit: I made this up

Did Chavez have the clams casino or is the rest of the offense making him sick?

200 cc’s Geritol, STAT !

Nunez the clown, keeping the bench loose with his antics.

The strikeout goes to Chavez so Nun-E can keep his popup streak alive next AB

Literally 2/3 of the lineup is just dreadful right now.

Oooh, the world just got a little better - now GD not only has video that only pretends to be muted, it’s added POP-OVER ads every half inning!
How great is that!
Someone needs to kill them.

Jesus-Chavez is done already?  What happened?

[65] Means the rotation is no longer the worst part of this team as only 2/5 of that is dreadful.

Conn, Sonar. Crazy Ivan !

Sure, Reynolds has 19 games without a K. How many games has it been since he’s had a HBP ? Let’s reset that, right now. It sets up the DP.

Great. Start paying attention to the runner on first. Throw it over there a couple times. Buck will have a squeeze steal on us any second now.

Arod probably fields that

I’d feel a lot better about Nova battling through this QS if I had the sense there were 3 or more runs in this offense.

That handsome bastard who wrote post 2 looks pretty smart right about now.

This is some old school WOE.

This is basically their last shot to score, right?

The operative word in [75] is OLD.

So painful to watch. The Yankees can’t hit against the O’s at home

Where are 3 runs going to come from? I don’t see it.

Too early to start trading away players?

At least Jeter will lead off the 9th

This team is done.

[79] I think the O’s have three more runs in them tonite.

These 71 Os sure can pitch

Well, there’s one.

[79] 4 runs.

I really hope the Yankees rebuild.

Cano, Grando, and Swish could fetch useful pieces. But even if it was the right call, they would never do it.

Too early to start trading away players?

No. Too late, actually. Nobody would want what we need to shed. But we’ll find plenty of action for Gardner, Granderson, Cano, whom everyone wants to let walk.

It’s a damned fine thing we didn’t make the mistake of going after CJ Wilson, Yu Darvish, Heinous Centipede, or keeping Montero.

Sure Joe, keep Nova in until he gives up five or six.

Hochevar (7.36 ERA) vs. Hughes (7.48) should be fun

Great job, Joe.

Good managing Girardi.

Have to think that this was Nova being left in too long.

Fuck the manager

That was the look of a man that knows his win streak is over.

[89] you were saying?

The [82] runner is in scoring position.

(89) No shit. What the grady little fuck was THAT all about? Really?

“and a Royals team still looking for their first win at home.” And I thought the Yankees were bad.

Nothing like Yankee pitching to get Nick Johnson going